My Memories....
Was talking to a fren who is in luv right now.. A girl of his dreams just came in... Although they arent together yet... I bet they will in a couple of days time.. Hes happy and im for sure happy for him too...
He was saying about how he badly wanted to hold her hands... I felt that too when i ferst met elf... I wanted him to hold my hand.. Wanted him to hold me and make me feel that im his forever... It was worth the wait... On That One Date I was his and he was mine... Nice feeling....
Anyway this fren of mine was asking for our opinions about the holding hands issue... And as a lady myself i tell him of what i want cause i know most gerls wants the same feeling..... I told him to either plunge in or ask nice "Mei can i hold your hand?" like a gentleman would.... He even suggested to get flower and give it to her before asking the question... Loads of effort put in just to hold the hands of his dreams... A perfect begining i think..... So simple and gentle yet so lovely...... Something which i have been missing a long time ago...... Yes im lucky that elf showered me with those expensive gifts..... One i know i cant afford on my own.... And i do appreciate it.... But sometimes it takes the simplest things to make someone happy and smile the whole day.....
There are loads of things i miss..... The 1am conversations then anxiety inside me just waiting for him to call or see him online.... The feeling i had when i was out with some other Jerk (befoe i was with him that is) i couldnt stop thinkin bout him.... It swas wonderful it was the sweetest memories.... These are the memories that will erase off all the worst times we had........ I gave him all my heart that very first date.. That very first hug and that very first kiss... The next step we took together.... The smile on his face and mine... I didnt have much heart aches back then... The heart aches i have now either made me stronger or made me fall on my knees and cry and wish that the terrible times didnt happen...
Sweet little messages i get thru my handphone... Nice phonecalls to say Hi what are you doing... 1 min conversation and then 10 mins after that another phone call same question....... We didnt get angry over that back then... But now we just find it irritating.... But why must it be that way.... I just dun geddit... Why must things change.... Why cant things stay the same.......
He made my dreams come true.. I once said to him "How can a person like you be in luv with a person like me? A person like can never get a hug from you. Something that i will long for all my life... You can NEVER be mine... Cause im not good enuff for you... He proved me wrong.... And i thank you...
Tears rolling down as i wrote this perhaps i feel the pain for those terrible times and yearn for the sweetest times..... Im not sure if i can rekindle that.... Im not sure for the future..... i dunno what the present is... Im lost.. I take what each day gives me.... Leaving him is never an option thats my promise.... If theres one thing i want to feel or do again.... I want to feel the day that i met Elf 20th August 2002........... Do everything the exact same way all over again... Even if its in my dreams it will be alrite... I just dun wanna argue anymore......
That were the nicest and sweetest memories i had... How does a person cry and smile at the same time? Is it the tears of pain and sadness or tears of joy.... Its the tears of joy thinking about the nice days and how much I miss him like that.......
Yours Truly,
Ann
1.33am 29/12/03
Its all Good.
Dun wanna be pierced right thru the heart anymore,
Physical Pain Does Not Hurt As Much as Emotional Pain...
For ELFIE
One Night, The Corrs
Andrea Corr, Caroline Corr
Long day and I'm ready, I'm waiting for your call
'Cos I've made up my mind
My heart aches with a hunger and the want that you were mine
No I cannot deny
So for one night, is it alright
That I give you
My heart, my love, my heart
Just for one night
My body, my soul
Just for one night
My love, my love
For one night, one night, one night
When morning awakes me
Well I know I'll be alone
And I feel I'll be fine
So don't you worry about me
I'm not empty on my own
For inside I'm alive
That for one night, it was so right
That I gave you
My heart - my heart - my love, my heart
Just for one night - one night -
My body, my soul
Just for one night - one night -
My love, I loved
For one night - one night - one night, one night
For one night, it was so right
That I gave you
My heart - my heart - my love, my heart
Just for one night - one night -
My body, my soul
Just for one night - one night -
My love, my love
For one night - one night - one night, one night
One night
Its all Good.
Just Pics
Its all Good.
Ok People Time To Pen Down Thoughts
Week has been tiring loads fo shitz happening..... No rest.. Spent a lot of time with Elf.... I guess he owed me the whole week becoz of his training... And sure enuff he did spare all his time with me.... We did our admin stuff and finally opened our joint alternate account together.... Nice knowing that we have the trust in each other... We are gonna pump in money every mth... A fixed amount for him but it varies for me as my pay aint fixed... Apart for the petty stupid arguements me n elf had we are still alright, doing pretty good...
Work's alrite been werking weird shift but its pretty kewl... I think i can handle it... Going for another course next month... Bet its gonna be kewl also...I think..
Been comin home late these days... I have no idea why... It just seems tat i have loads of things to do out there in the streets then at home... Whats to become of me??
Tomoro im off from work but im jammin from 1-3 haiizzzz... Just when i tot i could catch up with some sleep... Syhitz.... Got no choice though... We are gonna perform in Jb again soon and KL gig is commin soon too... BZ BZ BZ.... So many things to do so little time..... Hope we will be better this time round... Gonna release EP soon and tshirt will be printed out for us to put on during the gig.... kewl syhitz...
Hahaha ok dolz i think i better catch up with some rest... THE SINUS HAS ATTACKED... Its irritating... Till Then...
Its all Good.
When Time Stands Still
Its all Good.
The Nite Where We Went To HRC To Watch Bushmen
Its all Good.
Farking This Farking That
fuck fuck fuck
Its all Good.
I Made a Mistake And Im Sorry
Pretty confuse about the decisions i made recently... About leaving the bands... People just cant seem to understand that im under tremendous amount of pressure... Perhaps its just me thinking that everyone in the whole hates me now.. And no one is waiting for me at the bottom when i fall.. Not even ELf.. He called me an IDIOT... Maybe i deserved it.... But i just wanted a chance to explain myself..... Arghhhh..... Its ok uh... I thought they were my friends... I think they still are.... But i dun understand anything anymore........ Its a headache...... I hate this.... What have i got myself into.... Someone i know might be cursing at me right now.... Prolly saying "SHE WANTS TO LEAVE LET HER LAR"..... Without even thinkin twice.... Im going to be pretty much transparent now to everyone i once use to know.....
HATRED is in the air....
I FUCKING HATE CONFUSIONS.......
Its all Good.
Pretty Much Fucked Up
My PC is dying on me.. Gotta get a new one soon... Not now though perhaps somewhere next year.. Problems with my photo editing stuff.... Dammit gotta reformat my pc.. SYHITZ!!!
Anyway, Theres a few gigs coming up USV's way... The following are:
1. 11th January 2004 - Johor Bahru - My Last Gig with the lads
2. 14th February 2004 - Kuala Lumpur
3. 2 other singapore gigs which i dun know much about.
Total 4
Although i'm not going to play for the lads anymore i will still be ard watching them from the back taking pictures of their every move... I owe them them for the experience given... Rock On lads... GOOD FUN GOOD SHOW, BREAK LEGS EVERY SHOW..
Till Then
Its all Good.
No more writing, Just Plain Pictures
I will write but perhaps once in a blue moon... Now im just gonna put up pictures after pictures of me and my frens and my daily life.... And Elfie, i just want to remind you that the world dun go around you.. You will fall down and cry on ur knees one day.. And when you look back theres no one for you...
Its all Good.
I'm Finally Givin Up
I somehow have lost all hope in this relationship which im suppose to have... Elfie has been terrible... He has been very cold and different..... Hes always been thinking about himself.... He keeps calling me names and never wants to make things better.... The more hurt i am the more happy he is.... I dun think he needs me ard anymore.... Hes successful now, grown into a "Man".... Guess my work is done... And i have been pushed away countless of times....... I had to understand his situations all the time.... I made the sacrifices needed and its not that im asking for a return... I just want a little bit more time without having to rush here and there.....
Things said were hurtful from me and from you both the same.... But my words means nothing to him..... He just so Cold.... He said im not at the losing end..... But think again..... I've been thru so much and things kept piling up.... I am human and im drowning in this pile of problems... I need help, I seek help, i seek comfort how i wish someone was ard for me rite now... Cause i remembered what Elfie said to me this morning "I DUN CARE ABOUT ALL THIS RIGHT NOW, U HAVE TO BE THERE FOR URSELF" come to think about it i have never said such things to him....
Ann Shakes her head...
What have i done to deserve this?
Haven God punished me enuff with that abusive Ex-fiance of mine
Now this.... I just wonder Why??
All i want is to
Its all Good.
Peopke @ Work
Lynn a.k.a Da SHM
Yan V SB-TT
Ken a.k.a Mr Soh
Matyr a.k.a Adek
Alvin Da PT-SHM
Adek & Wan
Adek & Sabrina
Sabrina a.k.a Da Witch
Yan & Wan
Da Store
Picture Taken By Jeremy
Its all Good.
Good Looks Dun Mean Good Personality
He aint perfect
Elfie Raya At Ann's Place
Its all Good.
Michael Vartan
Its all Good.
Josey:
That thing, that moment. When you kiss someone and everything around you becomes hazy and the only thing in focus is you and this person; and you realize that that person is the only person that you're supposed to kiss for the rest of your life.
NEVER BEEN KISSED...
Its all Good.
The Perfect Cuppa
Its all Good.
To all married men and grooms-to-be out there ;)
----- Forwarded message
Subject: Dont lose that 90% that you already have ..
A very meaningful article indeed, to share
Adultery happens when you start looking for what you don't have.
"Wow, this girl in my office is a real looker. I'm crazy about her because she's
also understanding, intelligent, tender - so many things that my spouse is
not."Somewhere along the way,you'll find a woman or a man who will be more
charming or sensitive. More alluring.More thoughtful. Richer. Have greater sex
appeal.And you will find a woman or man who will need you and pursue you and go
loco over you more than your spouse ever did. Because no wife or husband is
perfect. Because a spouse will only have 90% of what you're looking for.So
adultery takes place when a husband or wife looks for the missing 10%.Let's say
your wife is melancholic by nature. You may find yourself drawn to the pretty
clerk who has a cherry laughter.Or because your wife is a homebody in slippers
and pyjamas, smelling
of garlic and fish oil, you may fall for a fresh-smelling young sales
representative that visits your office in a sharp black blazer, high heels,and a
red pencil-cut skirt. Or because your husband is the quiet type, your heart may
skip a beat when you meet an old college flame who has the makings of a talk
show host.But wait! That's only 10% of what you don't have.Don't throw away the
90% that you already have!Add to your spouse's 90% the 100% that represents all
the years that you have been with each other.
The storms you have weathered together.The unforgettable moments of sadness and
joy as a couple.The many adjustments you have made to love the other. The
wealth of memories that you've accumulated as lovers. Adultery happens when you
start looking for what you don't have.But faithfulness
happens when you start thanking God for what you already have. But I'm not just
talking about marriage. I'm talking about life!About your jobs. About your
friends.About your children.About your lifestyles. Are you like the economy
airline
The main message: If you start appreciating what you have right now, wherever
you are is FIRST CLASS!
ReacH OuT, ToucH FaiTH!
The beauty of a woman must be seen from her eyes,
Because that is the doorway to her heart,
The place where love resides.
Its all Good.
