24h April
Another gig comming up for USV... In Singapore, Planet Paradigm.....
24th April 2004..... ok tats it
Its all Good.
No One
Everytime i look up whenever im down...There no one there.... Its just so unfair.... The more problems i have the more scoldings i get.....If u call that comforting then yes i've gotten many of that...... Been happy these past few days... Ruined in just matters of minutes.... Argh..... Gonna be alrite i promise.... I just tot it was alil bit unfair that i dun hear nice words for comfort i got thrashed instead.... Screamed and Shouted at and critized and bein called names..... Just reminded me so much of how Justin treated me.... Horrible just so horrible........
It doesnt matter anymore...
Its all Good.
Woke Up An Angry Person
First thing i said today or shouted rather was "PELAN KAN LA".... I was still in bed, my brother blasted some hip hop shit.... Cant stand it.... Few mins later the tummy ached.... Argh!!!! Cant go back to sleep...... Nvm its 1pm anyway 5 hours of sleep is enuff to get me thru the day... Lunch time for Elf and he should be callin me soon... Hehehe... Speak of the devil, phone ringing.... Seeya~
Its all Good.
Too Much To Swallow
Not Feeling Rght..
Been pushing myself too far and too hard these days..... Body has been aching.. Mind disturbed... Kinda kept things to myself..... Yes im happy, yes im sad..... So which is which??? U sure are a dumb fuck Ann...
Gonna let it out here..... DO NOT... I repeat DO NOT ASK ME ANYTHING ABOUT TIZ ANYMORE......
Can't blame the world if there are bitches around... Neither can i blame it if there are liars ard...... This fuckin world is so depressing..... Expectations runs fucking high.... And those who cant reach it are pushed aside....Employers lay out the red carpet and shouts "MAKE WAY FOR THE COCK SUCKERS".....
Why cant people come clean and speak the fucking gawd daym truth.... Why the fuck do they wanna lie then suffer the consequences???? Weird so weird....... Fuck you btch leave me alone....... Take watever you want leave with it and go thru what i did.... Then tell me if tat was wat u FUCKING DREAM would happened.......
I've been scrutinize, critize, discriminated, battered & bruised, stereotyped, unappreciated, pushed and looked down upon.... Where have all this gotten me???? Fucking nowhere..... Because of all this i've lost all self-confidence, self-respect, strength, self-leverage, self-belief, self-worth..... Wateve SELF- u name it i've lost it......
I'm picking up the pieces.... Slowly but for sure it will come back...... And when it does... You fucking iniquitious imbeciles can kiss my feet....
The few things that kept me going is ELF... Put all the nasty things aside.... His love have brought me this far... My MOM, baby niece and baby nephew kept me sane..... I dunno what i'll do without them..... And Mom, I bet u never tot i would say this "But i love you more then anyone else in this world"
Cheerz,
Ann
4.27am Singapura Time
Its all Good.
ANSWER THE PHONE
SUGAR RAY
We're on this rollercoaster ride
Hold on, I'll stay here by your side
We head up to the sky then we slide back down
Upside down try to figure out
Not sure if we could work it out
I wanna be alone but you feel like home
Answer the phone,
I know that you're home
I wanna get you alone, and do it again, do it again
Answer the phone, I know that you're home
I wanna get you alone, and do it again, do it again
The signals all are flashing red
It doesn't matter what was said
This bed is much too big without me and you
This all seems so ridiculous
Why can't we just get over this
Don't make me say the obvious
Without you
Answer the phone, I know that you're home
I wanna get you alone, and do it again, do it again
Answer the phone, I know that you're home
I wanna get you alone, and do it again, do it again
I practice all my lines to a telephone while you were sleeping
I practice all my lines to a telephone while you were sleeping
I practice all my lines to a telephone while you were sleeping
I remember the way you curled your toes
On the side of the stage at all our shows
And the glow on your face just because of one rose
And when I wake up in the morning and you're wearing my cloths
Answer the phone, I know that you're home I wanna get you alone, and do it
again, do it again
Answer the phone, I know that you're home
I wanna get you alone, and do it again, do it again
Do it again, do it again and do it again, do it again
I wanna do it again, do it again and do it again, do it again
Its all Good.
My Paradise With Ants
Hahaha..... Baby called me today, asking me to meet him..... Said that he missed me..... hahaha.... well missed him too....... One of those simple short days where we did nothing.... Met at city hall, went to settle some bills at suntec... The bought food from LJS..... yummyyyyyyy......... Then sat down ayt promenade where we had small talks.... Laffed alot though....... The seats....... Ohhhh My Gawd the seatssssss Ants all over...... Arghhhhh.. No choice ah..... Wanted to sit on the seats with back rest.... had to endure the ants crawling.... I was squirmy but the "HERO" said "Dun worry i'm here..." In the end he was squimish himself.....haha so much for being the "HERO"...... hehehehe
And yeah he was like hugging me alot today..... hehehe.. So the very the manje.... Ya ok i hugged him alot too.... wakakaka..... These are those rare days where we get mushy mishy in public...... Luved It...... Thanks baby..... Muax.. Nice day...
Its all Good.
Wakakakaka
hehehehe...... Just got to know some facts about someone from baby elf..... I laffed... How can a crush go so bad...... HAHAHAHAHA...... RESPECT???? Kiss My Ass.... What kinda respect is it when u begin to have feelings for someone else's....Worst still when u are already with someone yourself..... Just shows you arent in control of urself n ur blardie feelings..... Wakakakakka..... This world is full of weird people..... I cant be bothered with these kinda rubbish.... Its not worth my time nor effort...... Everyone is grown up.... have a fucking brain to use.... USE IT dammit....... Embrassment At Its Best Dude..........wakakakakaka.....
Sian ah sian....... What a daym boring day........ Nothing much to do.... Today was one of those exceptional day where i ate in the dining room and watch tv in the living room..... Usually i will be stuck in my room doing those things in my own room...
Got a fone callllllll................. Byeeeeeeeee..............
Its all Good.
The Defects
Im Blastin' These Over n Over
U2 - All I Want Is You
Box Car Racer - I Feel So
Hahaha he new upcoming band.... Hahaha.... MSN chat is a blast... Was chattin with the dudes who else.... Elfie, Gene & Giam.... Wat did we get out of it?? Mostly rubbish.... hahaha.... Apart from the serious band issues.... Especially about my fucked trumpet... Save a dollar a day and i will get my brand new Yamaha Trumpet (the cheapest of course) in approx. a year and a half..... hehehe.... Yes im that pathetic... Cannot afford to back track and do A Levels... No financial support.... Work ferst la Ann....
I have not been doing my Olympus C50 justice.... Neglecting it abit... Only pictures i took were ordinary mundane ones.... Time to be unorthodox... Like a stupid rhapsody that i've heard once... Stupid but good.... Gotta read the mamual over again.. A friend said "MAKE FULL USE OF YOUR CAMERA, TRY ALL MODES" hehehe.. hes right u know... I have been lazy and have been using all the ez modes... Cant be bothered to use the manual one.. A/S/M.... I didnt touch these... They yearn for me but i pushed them away.... Buck up Ann.... Klik Klik Klik away.....
I've sat on the rollercoaster for far too long and somehow i've gotten use to it.. Cant predict the future, won't relive the past.. Lets live for today... Be thankful for what we have right in front of us.. The earth is nearer than the sky.. Grab it and let it flow thru ur fingers...
Guess i go do some stupid graphics now... Perhaps another collage for USV... Signing off now.... 4.50am Singapura Time
Its all Good.
My Iffy Drummer Boy
Went out with this lad (babykuk) today.... Enjoyable in a weird way...... hehehe
Last minute decision to go to the kallang gig.... Managed to watch one band only... After which the police were all over the place..... hahaha...... pathetic.....authorities breakin down the fun.... So hoorayyy we managed to catch one band only.....hahahaha.. Went to give sondee our support but it didnt happened. The authorities pulled the wires.... Sickening ah...... By 9pm everything was over and 2 mins late didnt play their set..... Efforts wasted..... For them i mean.....
3 cheerz for the authorities bringin happy times down...... hahahaha
Its all Good.
Colours
Its all Good.
Brighter Days Are Commin
Ok fine have not been posting pics here.... Most pictures i took were for the band... No abstracts no nothing..... Gotta find some nice walls or an object which makes sense to me.....
Met My cuzzin just now.... He's different now....... Very different..... No longer the herdi i use to know.....It Elsa now...... A woman with a boyfriend.... Miss him dearly.... Today was the first time we met after a few years... I know people change but why change like tat... Why him??? So sad So sad....
Its all Good.
Curtains Down, The Show Is Over..
Ok just got home.... 1 am walked home... Was in the bus but decided to drop off half way and walk... A lil bit confuse but GOD gave me the strength to pull myself together.. Not feeling so bad... Surprise i can handle these tough times of my life....
Good Bye My Actor.... Take a Bow And End The Show...
Good Night....
Its all Good.
Damped
Met my baby late today... He fetch me from home and off we headed to city hall by bus... He had some trouble today... He worried sick and i was too... Worst part was i couldnt say or do anything about it... I cannot do anything to change the situation.. I Wish I Could... I really wish i could baby.... But i managed to make him smile.... When he smiles im happy for him....
In the bus we were talking bout some stuff... Told me some gerl called him... And bla bla bla..... People said that im lucky n fortunate to have him.... Why?? Because he has the look??..... Yeah in that aspect I AM LUCKY..... But why dun they say hes lucky to have me who have withstand all the nonsense and tolereated his tantrums and rubbish for the past 19 months..... Ehhhh...... Wait..... Come to think of it, 2 person said that....... Hahaha AraFirman and Farhat........ khekhekhkehkehke......... Well ANN theres nothin to complain..... hehehe..... Cause I Luv Tat Dude And He Luvs Me More... What else can i ask for....
Hes asleep now.... Sleepin all hs troubles away for awhile.... I feel what he feels... I know how dreaded it is to be in his position..... I've been there..... And i solved it... Dun put too much pressure on urself baby... Its gonna hurt me more to see you like this then it hurts you...
Its all Good.
More Wordy Stuff.....
To fill up the day......
Your words are my food, your breath my wine. You are everything to me.
All that you are, all that i owe you, justifies my love, and nothing, not even you.
Being with you is like walking on a very clear morning - definitely the sensation of belonging there.
The way you let your hand rest in mine, my bewitching Sweetheart, fills with happiness. It is the perfection of confiding love. Everything you do, the little unconscious things in particular charms me and increases my sense of nearness to you, indentification with you, till my heart is full to overflowing.
There's only one thing greater than my fear - that is my love. My love will always conquer my fear - but it can't do it immediately. It needs the full force of my love to do it and it takes days for that to emerge out of its dark hiding places.
I cannot exist without you - I am forgetful of everything but seeing you again - my Life seems to stop there - I see no further. You have absorbed me. I have a sensation at the present moment as though i were dissolving.
The soul that can speak with its eyes can also kiss with a gaze.
It is love, not reason, that is stronger than death.
See there's this place in me where your fingerprints still rests, your kisses still linger, and your whispers softly echo. It's the place where a part of you will forever be a part of me.
Love is like a violin. The music may stop now and then, but the strings remain forever.
Truly loving another means letting go of all expectations. It means full acceptance, even celebration of another personhood.
A person can be in love with someone forever till the end of time. But if that person doesn't tell or show the feelings of love, it will be just another person living in a dream, lost of true love.
How grave is my condition, for i cannot find the words to say, I need you so.
I tell you i love you every day for fear that tomorrow isn't another.
Somewhere there's someone who dreams of your smile, and finds in your presence that life is worth while, so when you are lonely, remember this is true: Somebody, somewhere is thinking of you.
I fell in love with you the second i layed eyes on you, it had nothing to do with to do with way you looked, there was something in your eyes, then i found out what was in your heart.
Once you've felt love, you'll know it's love because you don't want to let it go.
Hopeless romantics are only hopeless in the eyes of those who don't believe in romance.
You know its love when all you want is that person to be happy, even if you're not part of their happiness.
Sometimes it's hard to love someone because you're so afraid of losing them.
Within you i lose myself. Without you i find myself wanting to become lost again.
To have the rose, you must accept the thorns
A friend is always good to have but a lover's kiss is better than angels raining down in me.
I've loved you forever, in lifetime before.
In order to get to the Rainbow, you must first conquer the rain.
You call it madness, but i call it love.
To have one confess his love to thee, you must have his heart, for he can only thee more, if you are never part
Distance between two hearts is not an obstacle... rather a beautiful reminder of just how strong true love can be.
Its all Good.
Oh So Not Original,
Not Written By Me Too....
Oh, what good will writing do?
I want to put my hand out and touch you.
I want to do for you and care for you.
I want to be there when you're sick and you're lonesome.
I miss you even more than i could have believed; and i was prepared to miss you a good deal. So this letter is just really a squel of pain. It is incredible how essential to me you have have become. I supposed you are accustomes to people saying these things. Damn you, spoilt creature; I shan't make you love me any more by giving myself away like this - But oh my dear, I can't be clever and stand-offish with you: I love you too much for that.
And indeed i felt happy with him, so perfectly happy, that the one desire of mine was that it should differ is nothing from his, and already i wished for nothing beyond his smile, and to walk with him thus, hand in hand, along a sun-warmed, flower - bordered path.
I fell in love with his courage, his sincerity, and his flaming self-respect and it's these things i'd believe in even if the whole world indulged in wild suspicions that he wasn't all he should be... I love him and that's the beginning of everything.
Its all Good.
Kept Phrases
THE HEART KNOWS WHEN THE SEARCH IS OVER
A DREAM IS A WISH YOUR HEART MAKES WHEN YOU ARE ASLEEP. IF ONLY PLACE WHERE I COULD SEE YOU IS IN MY DREAMS, I'LL SLEEP FOREVER
NEVER TAKE A PERSON CLOSE TO YOUR HEART FOR GRANTED BECAUSE YOU MIGHT WAKE UP ONE DAY AND REALISED THAT YOU HAVE LOST A DIAMOND WHILE YOU WERE TOO BUSY COLLECTING STONES.
THERE IS ONE PAIN I OFTEN FEEL. WHICH YOU WILL NEVER KNOW, IT'S CAUSED BY ABSENCE OF YOU.
IF IT'S WRONG TO LOVE YOU THEN MY HEART JUST WON'T LET ME BE RIGHT.
UNSPOKEN LOVE IS LIKE A POISON. IF YOU KEEP IT TO YOURSELF FOR A LONG TIME,IT WILL CONSUME YOU FROM THE INSIDE.
THE WORSE THING A GUY COULD DO TO A GIRL WHEN HE DON'T INTEND TO CATCH HER FALL.
IF YOU CARE AND LOVE SOMEONE, DO NOT LOSE A GRIP ON THE PERSON. YOU'LL NEVER KNOW THE ONE YOU LET GO MIGHT BE THE ONE YOU'VE WAITED FOR ALL YOUR LIFE.
DON'T BE TOO GOOD, I'LL MISS YOU
DON'T BE TOO CARING, I MIGHT LIKE YOU
DON'T BE TOO SWEET, I MIGHT FALL FOR YOU
IT'S HARD FOR ME TOO LOVE YOU WHEN YOU WON'T LOVE ME AFTER ALL.
NEVER SAY I LOVE YOU WHEN YOU DON'T REALLY CARE,
NEVER TALK OF FEELINGS WHEN THEY AREN'T REALLY THERE,
NEVER HOLD MY HAND IF YOU MEAN TO BREAK MY HEART,
NEVER SAY FOREVER IF YOU EVER PLAN TO PART,
NEVER SAY I'M THE ONE IF YOU DREAM OF MORE THAN ME,
NEVER EVER LOCK UP MY HEART, WHEN YOU DON'T HAVE THE KEYS.
Its all Good.
Together We Will Bring Down The Wall
In his strong arms i fell asleep... One of the moments where i can stare at him and see him smile... Been doing that alot lately... My mind says "Luv dun know when to stop, when its all going too fast" Luv ya Elfie Baby
Hear The Sounds Of Jimmy Eat World - The Authority Song
Wall Courtesy of SnakeWeed Studio..
Hehehehe
Its all Good.
For every kiss you give me, I'll give you three
Say u'll be my darlin Be my baby now.. Well you are Elfie Hussain..... Hahaha..... Had a nice goofy time with this dude today.... Short but niceeeeeeee..... "evil grinz" Wah lan my body aches...... Cannot tahan liao must lie down........
Its all Good.
Travis
Be My Baby
The day we met I knew I needed you so
And if I had the chance I'd never let you go
So won't you say you love me
I'll make you so proud of me
We'll make them turn their heads every place we go
So won't you please (be my, be my baby)
Be my little baby (my one and only baby)
Say you'll be my darling (be my, be my baby)
Be my baby now (my one and only baby)
I'll make you happy baby
Just wait and see
For every kiss you give me
I'll give you three
Oh since the day I saw you
I have been waiting for you
You know I will adore you till eternity
So won't you please (be my, be my baby)
Be my little baby (my one and only baby)
Say you'll be my darling (be my, be my baby)
Be my baby now (my one and only baby)
Its all Good.
Dignity And Respect....
Slow start.... Couldnt sleep throughout the afternoon.... Dad K-Oking.. Sheesh...... Went out with elf.... Had long walks and talks..... Got to know that some new gerls were callin him or his callin them....He gave me their names too...... Whatever la.... Its cool..... Im alrite with it..... As long as he knows his line and those gerls knows theirs.... Then again..... Why do i need to think about it.... Sua la...... hehehehe
We talked mostly about self respect and dignity...... And i did tell him bout Nathan Foxley.... My personal advisor.... Thanks Nathan my man...... Owe you a big fat dinner dude...... hehehe.....
Overall day GOOD......
Spent 14 bucks only on
- Ciggies $5 (shared with elf)
- Bus Fare To And Fro $4
- Food $5 (My only meal for the day) FARKIN RIPPED OFF
Its all Good.
This Song Will Become The Anthem Of Your Underground
3 things.......
Elf, Recording, My day
Elf... Pretty weird this past few days.... I've made dozens of comprimises.... Some of which if i was to tell all of you, you will think that im crazy to let my bf do such things.... Well, if it is to make things better why not... Give it a shot... But 1 thing i constantly reminded him was to not ever let me know.... Let people know or see.... As long as i dunno about it, its gonna be ok.... heeeee.....
Recording was alrite... As usual the crazy bunch was ard at leonard's lair.... Jumping around making weird and crappy BUT funny jokes...... Elf and myself had some talks..... And we're pretty close that day... Very "manje" with each other.... I seriously dunno why...... It was sweet..... Dunno how this will last though.... Im ridin on a Fuckin Rollercoaster... Supper was fabulous..... I didnt have much to eat... And the lads finished up the Fried Kway Tiao i brought...... But i was so happy when i finally ate the Nasi Goreng Ayam i have been dreaming off.... hehehe....
The day..... I didnt go out..... But im exhausted..... Been in front of the pc the whole day finishing up the collage....... And finally its done.... Pass it to man and he asked me if i could make some changes to 8 pictures..... And i did.... Now it finally done.... FOR REAL...... hahahaha..... Elf got into trouble today.... I really dunno how to react.... hahahaha..... Hope he learnt something from it......
Happy Anniversary To You Too Baby~~~!!!!!
Thanks for reminding me this time round......
Its all Good.
Sweetness
Jimmy Eat World
If you're listening? whoaaaa
Sing it back whoaaaa
String from your tether unwinds
(String from your tether unwinds) whoaaaa whoaaa
Up and outward to bind
(Up and outward to bind) whoaaaa whoaaaa
I was spinning free whoaaaa
With a little sweet and simple numbing me
Are you listening? whoaaaa
Sing it back whoaaaa
So tell me what do I need
(Tell me what do I need) whoaaaa whoaaaa
When words lose their meaning
(When words lose their meaning) whoaaaa whoaaaa
I was spinning free whoaaaa
With a little sweet and simple numbing me
Yeah, stumble 'til you crawl whoaaaa
Sinking into sweet uncertainty
oooooo ooooo oooooo ooooo )--4 times alone
oooooo ooooo oooooo ooooo )--4 times with ahhh's underneath
ahhhhh ahhhh ahhhhh ahhhh
Are you listening?
Are you listening?
If you're listening whoaaa
If you're listening
Are you listening?
Sing it back whoaaaa
If you're listening
Are you listening?
And I'm still running away
(I'm still running away) whoaaaa
I won't play your hide and seek game
(I won't play your hide and seek game) whoaaaa
I was spinning free whoaaaa
With a little sweet and simple numbing me
What a dizzy dance whoaaaa
The sweetness will not be concerned with me
No, the sweetness will not be concerned with me
No, the sweetness will not be concerned with meeeee (hold note)
Its all Good.
Newz Flashz
Ta Daaaa....I am SICK again!! Fantastic ey?? Sick practically every month.... Haven been in the brink of health.... Stress prolly.... Loads of things in my mind.... Its alrite i'll be fine...
Recording with the lads tomoro... Gonna be fun.... Not sure for me though... Im so very sick.... Hope tomoro i'll be ok....
Nite Luvlys
Its all Good.
The Way I See It
Emotional Turmoil which brought tears to my eyes..
These are the glasses that hide those tears way from you..
Its all Good.
My Baby The "Garang" Corrections Officer
Its all Good.
Words Eats You Back
Think before you speak.. Whatever the situation is... Dun say things and dun mean it.. Dun say things at the spur of the moment... Words are weapons even the strongest man can be defenceless when you say the right thing.... Harsh words hurt people.... Things are made worst when someone already tell you that those word are harsh and you continue to say "It your business not mine!" JERK!!!! Just remember what you say to that person may come back to you three times as hurtful.... Perhaps not by the person himself but by someone else.... GOD has his way....
I dun feel like going out tomoro..... Perhaps i will stay home and do my own things... No disturbance please.... Suppose to meet elf... But i will cancel it when he calls me... Space is Good!!
cheerz!!
Its all Good.
Words Bites Back
Whenever you say something which you deemed were merely at the spur of the moment, think twice.... Use your brain to think.... Not ur ass.... Whatever you say now to hurt another will come back to you three times.... Like they say.... What comes around goes around..... Being selfish and arrogant about it doesnt help.... CHANGE!!! Stop hurting others.... When other people cry because of you and u say that its none of your business and you laff at their face, you are a total jerk..... What happens when YOU cry and theres no one around to confort you and to make sure you are feeling alrite... You will die a bitter and lonely old man/woman..
Remember the consequences of your actions....
Its all Good.
Its almost 6am still cant think of any solution...... Might as well drop dead.....
Its all Good.
Contradiction
Thank God for no popups.. Uploaded this nicey song..... enjoy!!!!
Its all Good.
Artist : All-American Rejects
Song : Too Far Gone
Album : The All-American Rejects
I should warn you
Things you're feeling, aren't normal now.
Think you need me
It's not easy, let you go some how.
Now we're too far gone,
Hope is such a waste
Every breath you take you give
me the burdens bitter taste
You promise that you'd stay
You say you want to go
Your lips provide a shelter for the
things that i don't know
Please speak slowly
My heart is learning
Teach me heart-ache,
Stop this burning now.
Wishful thinking
Patience shrinking, bliss is far away
North is calling
Now I'm falling, at your feet please stay
Its all Good.
No More Talking Ann!
Gig was alrite.... Did much better then Tues... Music was good.... No one knew who the hell we were.... Its was cool......
Was on the phone with elf..We did some talking.... And i realise i was a disappointment to myself..... Been thinking about what we talked about..... And yes i guess its time for me to zip my mouth.... No more ocmments about anyone or anything anymore..... So disappointed with myself..... I dun believe that i actually need to be under the influence of alcohol to loosen up and do outrageous things..... This is so depressing...... Avoidance is necessary at this stage... Leave that part of my life for a while and go on with what i have now...... I really dunno how to spice things up.... Been thinking and thinking... I willthink for hours i guess..... Dun think i will be able to sleep with a clear mind...... Have to comeup with a solution soon....
Cheerz
Its all Good.
Bus Scene 1
Aint over till the fat lady sings..
Ok that was that... I waited for the fucking bus for like half an hour... Fuckin pist.... I didnt sit the whole time while waiting for the bus to arrive cause theres loads of people from i have no idea where.... Finally it came and VUAAA LA!!! it was fuckin full.......Shitz the heels of my feet would have came off if it wanted to..... sheesh.... Ok alrite, i minded my biznez stood at one corner with my mind running like a train.... Suddenly i heard 2 ladies arguing.... 1 chinese woman mid 30s and an indian woman mid 30s... Heres wat happened... The chinese woman had occupied the whole sit to herself... Half of it with some paperbags and a baby pram...
Bus was full like i said....
So this indian lady came up to her and talk to her...
She said "Why cant you put ur things at one side so that other people can sit down. We paid the bus fare not to let your things sit on the chair".
The chinese lady said "if i let people sit where i want to put my things??.
She replied "By the side of course!!....
Then the chinese lady muttered some chinese stuff to her family in front of her....
Then i heard the indian lady said "STUPID"...
Finally it came, the outburst from the chinese woman "YOU WANT TO SIT YOU SIT LA"
She calmly replied "Wat are you screaming for?? Are crazy??" then bla bla bla...'
Chinese woman muttered some shitz again in chinese....
Last things i heard from the indian lady was "If i can slap you i would already have."
Then the journey became boring again....
Attiudez of Minah Karat Taik
Ok finally i got my seat... Hoping someone wont bug me while i make it through the journey.... i was sitting at the last row of the bus... Like a normal person would.. I sat in the middle... Fine no one wanted to sit..... So suddenly came this mother of all huge hipped KARAT HAIR MINAH WITH NO BRAINS... She came to the back with her bf... Shit this 2 cant be separated ballzzzzz..... The guy was ok..... When she came to the back i heard her murmured something... I couldnt make out what the fuck she was saying so i choose to ignore her.... And with her bad pronounciation of Excuse, she raised her voice and said it with no courtesy at all.... "EXCUS" without the E.... WHAT THE FUCK????? You expect people to understand what your saying when u dun open your blaride mutha farking mouth to speak instead of murmuring!!!! To top it all you just said excuse HOW THE FUCK WOULD I KNOW YOU WANTED UR FARKIN BF TO SIT BESIDE YOU SO THAT HE CAN GROPE YOU ALL THE WAY TILL YOU REACH YOUR DESTINATION..... STUPID NO BRAINER BIMBOS.... SHEESH....... guess she wasnt taught any basic courtesy or proper english in her life.... Perhaps thats why she couldnt say "Excuse me, do you mind movin in a little so my bf here can sit too"... Pity her..... Maybe i should have advised her to go for english classes or some civic and moral classes.......
FUCK ASS BITCH!!!
Its all Good.
"Kalau you cakap i tak sayang you, i dunno what to say already"
That was what elf said to me just now... hahaha... Had a great and early day with him.... Met him at 10+am and off we went to settle some admin stuff...(Pay bills, yada yada).. We did nothing much pratically but we walked all over town... It was a sunnyyyy day..... terrible man.....hehehe.....Although we didnt spend long hours together, i must say it was QUALITY time well spent...... We didnt where to go but we just continued walkin and finally decided to have some cold ice kacang at Plaza By The park Kopitiam.... Niceeeeeee.... Again let me remind you... It was a hot sunny day.... khekhe..... Ok time check it was 4.45pm... Elf had to leave for work..... Before leaving the place i had told him that im short of change for the bus fare.... He nodded and we forgot all about it when we got into some conversation.... Ok time to go.....we stood by the traffic light where i was suppose to cross to my bus stop, hugged and kissed each other goodbye before we went to or respective bus stops..Pretty reluctant to go our ways...But there was no choice...He had to work and i had to go home.. Mine was at YMCA while his was near bugis....
I was happily crossing the road (stupiddddddd the way they laid the traffic lights was so dumb that i had to cross 3 traffic lights at the same junction before i can walk straight to another junction.....So stupid....hehehe).... suddenly i realize Elf didnt pass me the money..... I frantically search my pockets for loose change..... Lucky for me i had enuff for the bus ride..... Rite, time to wait for the bus..... I was pretty restless cause i couldnt stand the heat... Turn my head here and there then suddenly someone or should i say someone's t-shirt caught my eye.... It was my BABY!!!! I was a lil bit confuse for a while but i smiled..... For the opposite road he was doin some hand signal...."Money!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I took my change and showed him...hahaha.... He was sweating and panting.... He actually took a risk by turning back from where he was.... What if i already boarded the bus.... Effort in vain man..... I asked what he was doing at my bus stop... He replied that he just remembered that he had forgotten to given me the bus fare and was worried sick about how am i to go home with no money... The best part was that we have already reached his bus stop and upon reaching there he turned back and pratically ran to look for me... I wipe his sweat away with my hands and told him to take a cab to work.... no point tiring himself out to go back to the bus stop.... So he said ok lets go to McDonalds to sit for a while... Bought a drink and then he said
"Kalau you cakap i tak sayang you, i dunno what to say already" didnt sound sincere at first.... But then i saw the true emotions..Tears of emotions.. He was willing to go to any lengths for me.... He cared for me.. First time that he actually showed this.... Throw away all the bad things now Ann.... He Luvs you more then you can handle.....
Maybe because we were relunctant to go.... We wanted to spend more time together.. I was thinking bout him and vice versa...... Guess he read my mind.... Luv ya baby, you have proven your worthiness.....
Its all Good.
Changed
The GATAL me has changed me template again... hehehehehhe :P
Its all Good.
When people resort to name-calling.
Humans are bound to be pessimistic or simply haughty at times. Why the need to diss others or be obdurate? Ask yourself that. Take for example if someone decides to walk out of your life, what do you do? You diss them don’t you? If someone resigns from your company you tend to say things, which are completely exaggerated or untrue. Why obfuscate things? What if a few friends decides that they are going to look for greener pastures and build something amongst themselves, are you going say “Those idiots aren’t going make it without me?” Just remember these “idiots” were once your friends or even a loved one. The first person you should blame is yourself. Ask yourself why these “idiots” extricate themselves from you. Maybe you can see the clearer picture then. Why resort to name-calling? It will get you nowhere. Imagine one day you find out they have gone much further than you. And poor you, still stuck at the same place doing the same old things while they have move on to greater heights and have gone places you dream to be. Even with great success these friends of yours still thinks lowly of themselves and do whatever it can to make it right with you. Stay arrogant and you will be ashamed of yourself. Call it truce. Most of us are no longer kids for God sake. There is no such thing, as “I don’t want to befriend you anymore”. Learn to accept it and move on. Grow up dammit. The world isn’t going to wait for you. I can hate this discrimination business but I can’t totally show my abhorrence. It’s a cycle, a chain that I would love to break.
Effusion 2
Its all Good.
Off days?
Tuesday 9th March 2004
Gigggggggg..... Everything was a rush.... I didnt get any info what time to meet and blah blah blah.... HP was dead..... CHAOS from the start ballz....... Elfie was the last to arrive.... We were soooooooooooo late......... And the people were waiting for us......SINCERE APOLOGIESSSSS...... Didnt wish for any of that to happen.... Just so happens that some of us were rushing from work or classes......
Sad to say.... We played below our own standards.... Perhaps we rushed too much that we could take a breather...... The moment we arrived, we had to set up and wa la we had to start playin...... My mind wasnt collected....Still all over the place... And i suck!!! hehehe.... No more of sucking Ann..... Time to give your best in everything......
Got some stuff done..... Pretty busy even though i was home the whole day..... Played with my niece n nephew did some designs for usv, finish uo some writing which needs editing and cut up the stickers.... Finally.......
Jamming this friday.... Have stuff in store for the day.... Hope everything goes smoothly.......
Another gig on sunday..... Last one before we go on a hiatus..... Loads projects for the band... Hope it works out..... Luvly.....
My baby is fine... Hes sleeping soundly at home now..... Had a good conversation.... Exchange ideas and opinions about some stuffs... Safe to say that we do have differences... Luv that dude.....
Its all Good.
What's love?
When you are together with that special someone, you pretend to
ignore that person. But when that special someone is not around, you
might look around to find them. At that moment, you are in love.
Although there is someone else who always makes you laugh, your eyes
and attention might go only to that special someone. Then, you are in
love.
Although that special someone was supposed to have called you long
back, to let you know of their safe arrival, your phone is quiet.
You are desperately waiting for the call!
At that moment, you are in love.
If you are much more excited for one short e-mail from
that special someone than other many long e-mails,
you are in love.
When you find yourself as one who cannot erase all the messages in
your answering machine because of one message from that special
someone, you are in love.
When you get a couple of free movie tickets, you would
not hesitate to think of that special someone.
Then, you are in love.
You keep telling yourself, "that special someone is just a friend",
but you realize that you can not avoid that person's special
attraction. At that moment, you are in love.
An Email From a Friend
Its all Good.
Puffy Creamy Eyes
Eyes all puffed up and ready to go... Haizzz gonna take a few hours of sleep to get this puffyness off my eyes.......
Gotta gig tomoro at NUS....... Not tat hype about it...... But will do my best for me buddy Giam who wont be able to make due to the passing of his beloved granny.... Hang in there dude....
Will be meeting him tomoro though... Gotta borrow hs trumpet cause mine has been giving me problems since recording..... Valve problems..... Will be heading down to dennis on my own... If not tomoro maybe weds... will give him a call first.....
Gotta plan wat to do with my week..... Gotta keep myself occupied with the free time i have in hand..... Need my space to breathe..... Perhaps i'll go to the beach one of these days..... Equipped with my digicam and fire away... the way i like it..... Yeah maybe i should.....
News from the gang leader himself...... Telling us that our kedah gig is confirm in may and sere,mban in june will be confirmed soon........ Betta come up with new materials fast dude...... :D
Gotta go now...... Meeting the MOST GGOD LOOKING, HANDSOME DUDE OF USV early......our very own politician GIAM......hehehe..... So i better get some rest...... ciaoz
Its all Good.
Are You Ok?
Ask me that and my mouth will Answer "Yes im alrite".... But my heart and my mind would disagree... "I will be alrite" tats what i will say to make make tat someone feel better...
How can someone smile so wide for the camera when taking a picture their luv one.... When at the end of the day its just a total lie... How can you love someone so much and hurt them too... I just dont understand all this... I would never understand.....
Too many memories...Nice ones lemme forget the bad ones. I'll keep the nice ones forecer....
Let the butterfly fly free... And thats what i am gonna do.....
What we had was different and special... If we were meant to be then we are... No one including ourselves can beg to differ...
Sleepin Wth Memories & Tears....
Ann
Its all Good.
Wat Was On???.
Rite very long day..... Loads of upsets..... Hated it at ferst... But things went pretty alrite... Met Kin ferst at jurong... I just need to get out of the house.... She helped me cut out the sticker thingy... Then off to bedok where i was suppose to met man at 6.30..... But ended up meeting Elf.... He gave me a box of After 8..... A chocolate i like the box but i wont be able to finish the chocolates... I still have the after * white chocolate in my fridge...hehehe..... Jammin was sucky....One man down and we felt the strain.... So empty without Giam..... Missed his trumpet tunes badly.... Come back soon bro...
Kiss and make up... Thats All We Did.....
You worked hard i know..... You deserve your fun not yesterday not now but soon.. Jealousy wont get you anywhere......
An Advice given by a Good Fren: If you keep on chasing a butterfly it will continue to fly away, but if you sit and wait for a while, you might not know if it will come to you and rest on you...........
Its all Good.
Crap
Read some article from my email....
This is what i found out......
I am a Cat: An extremely lovable, adorable person, sometimes shy,with a passion for quick wit. At times, you prefer quietness. You love exploring various things and going into depth of each thing. Under normal circumstances you're cool, when given a reason to, you are like a volcano waiting to erupt. You're a fashion bird. People look forward to you as an icon associated with fashion. Basically, you mingle along freely but don't like talking much to strangers. People feel very easy in your company. You observe care in choosing your friends.
Its all Good.
NOTHING LASTS FOREVER EVEN LIFE
Its all Good.
Mixed Feelings
Had a fun time today with Gene, Man, Sondee and Kin... Thanks for going to the career fair with me and thanks for bringin me around today... Thanks alot i really appreciate it.
Elf called me along the way.. Cause i couldnt make any calls.... Very happy to hear from him each time he called.......You could actually see my face glowing and smiling..... The last time i talked to him while out was on my way home in a bus.. He said he will wait for to get home.. I rushed home as fast as i could showered quickly and settled doen within 10 mins upon reaching home..But He didnt... It was alright.... Called him only to know he already went to bed... I told myself its alright.. I had to be strong .... Dun be Angry Ann, Dun be Sad Ann... I kept telling myself that..
Mixed emotions.. I tried to voice out my feelings but he just wouldnt listen... If he doesnt listen then who would.... Had a huge row..... I wanted to leave... I was strong while on the phone... "Look Ma, No Tears!"...Tats wat i told myself.. I couldnt hold it back.... I was mocked at, critised and was looked upon so lowly..... As low as a scum... Why do i have to withstand all this... The only answer was because i luved him.... Luved him hard enuff to let this precious tears roll down my cheeks... Luved him enuff to sacrifice so many things.. But why was i stabbed so deeply in the heart? Maybe because im useless....
Now i dunno what to do.... How am i gonna face you tomoro during jammin.... How am i gonna react when i know i cant hug u as usual.... I cant luv u like i use to?? Im so confuse.... Im an emotional wreck..... Perhaps i should give the jammin session a pass.... I need to think clearly and accept this fact... Learn to make u my friend..... Can i do it?? Only time will tell.... Unless the wind blows in a different direction....
Sweet Nitemares
Its all Good.
Disappointed Totally
The only person i never tot would mock me has just proven me wrong... I seriously cant live with this..... How can you live with someone whom wont make u feel good about urself and with whom u dun feel safe anymore..... I think i better find greener pastures..... Im so sad i could die.....
Sigh
Its all Good.
Promises Are To Be Honoured
MorNing
In a short space of few hours, many things happened.. Got a msg from man.. He said that giam's granny is sick and has been admitted to the hospital...He might not be able to join us for mixing, jamming and he upcoming gigs... Hang in there dude... All of us are behind you.. And seriously i dun feel that its appropriate for the band to go on with the gig if (touchwood) anything happens....
Was on the phone with Elf alot today...... Oklah nothin much.....
When you promise someone something make sure you honour that promise... Cause that very promise you make will show others the kind of person you are... Its hard but you gotta try.... Even if u cant fulfil it try to put in some effort... Perhaps you will get some credits for that....
Going to the career fair with some of the lads tomoro... With Kin too.. Early morning dammit..... Arghhhhh Sianz.......
Bluerkkkkkkkkkkkkk
Its all Good.
We're Back - 3rd March 2004
We were suppose to go to leonard to do mixing and in the end it was cancelled a the very last minute.. So since all of us were already out.. We met up at Bugis and had lunch together... Those who came were Giam, Gene, Man, Dee, Elf, DD (our ex-bassist, he joined us for a while) and myself....
Finally after so long we are chillin together again.. Went to Swee Lee to check out some stuff and then to the McD near bras basah.... It was a great feelin chllin out again.. Nice..... Pool was fun... Nobody could defeat the King until he got tired... Hehehehe... Fun day i should say... Looking forward to Saturday... Jammin!!!!!!
I've dumped some of the pictures here...
Cheerz!!
Elfie And Lil Bro D.D
Kung Fu Master & Students & Bystanders
I'm Lovin It
Sondee is Angry & Elf Apologizes
Elfie
Giam
PooL, 2 Audience (Man & Gene) & Elf
King Sondee
Ballz
Elfie Again
Boy Band Back in 1928
Another Boy Band in 1928
Its all Good.
Nostalgia
Feeling Nostalgic i could cry... hehehe..... Listening to
No Doubt's Underneath It All.... Brings back the font memories.....The first date with elf..... How nice.... First official date First Hug And the Ultimate First Kiss.... Then we embarked on our own journey.... ! and a half years.... After so much shitz we are still together.... Cry as much as we like.... hate each other as much we like.....Swear n Curse.... The tons of Break Ups and Make Ups.....(We break up mostly less then a day....hehehe.... stupid but true).... But we're stilllllll here..... Sasshayin around singapore together.... Both of us are a couple of nonsensical idierts who argue about almost anything stupid.... And at the end of the day we laff kiss n make up..... Crazy huh.....
Its almost 4am and im still up.... Repeating the song over and over.... Thinking about him sleeping so soundly at home.... Pity him at times.... He works so hard and yet he dun really see where his money has gone to.... 1 thing about him is his generousity... He can be a spendthrift too u know.... And he dun mind payin loads of money for his music.... His 1st luv...He will give up everything if he has to for his music... Hehehehe.. Hes a special boy in my life.... Humour me with his goofyness..... Although i say "Ur not humourous u know,so stop trying to be funny"... hahahha..."SO MEAAAAAAAN" (Remember tiz baby?? hehehe) I'm mean yes i am... But thats me... Hes sweet and pretty sensitive at times...(can be a complete jerk and asshole too)....... Im kinda stern with him sometimes but i will always always soften up when i see the change in his face... Especially when he looks like a little boy who has just be reprimanded by his mummy... hehehe.... How can i not luv this guy.... He's my strength and my weakness..... I dunno what i'll do without him..... Thats My Baby,
ELFIE
A Note To Remind Me About Him....
Always In Ann's Mind.......
Its all Good.
I Need Time
Gimme some time to finish this daym blog alrite.... hehehe..... laterz.......
Its all Good.
